They were all over the papers. Young, handsome Israeli couple - Yonatan and Omer Gher - became proud parents of a baby boy through a surrogate mother at a fertilty clinic in Mumbai. Nice I thought. Children are the ultimate culmination of love too under normal circumstances. With that I flipped through the rest of the pages.

But India is outraged, it seems. Because later that evening, as I was surfing TV channels, I came upon debates over debates over adoption of babies by same sex partners. The fact remains, homosexuality in India is illegal. So it is with many other things in India which is governed by rules that have remain unchanged for hundreds of years. Our lawmakers have not had the time nor the inclination to change these antiquated laws. But commercial surrogacy, which is banned in most parts of the world, does not come under the purview of law in India, which makes it easy for foreigners to come and adopt babies here. The ire of many an Indians. Medical tourism is boon for some, bane for others!

The prime concern of self righteous citizens is this: since homosexuality is illegal, adoption by gay couples should also be banned. Because, they say, such news can shake the very foundation of the family system and leads to its breakdown; it can also have a bad influence on the minds of children. I am appalled. I am not a gay activist. But the question that looms large in my mind is: why are we such hypocrites? We accept enunchs, we have shared knowledge of sex to the world through the Kamasutra, we even have a Goddess married to five brothers at once (there must be more). But we cannot accept real people and their real needs.

What about human rights? Must we decide whether gays can raise babies or not? And what family system are we talking about? Why are the traditional joint family system disappearing and why are we seeing more and more nuclear families? Why is incest so rampant in north India? What about the rape of infants reported practically every second day in newspapers? The questions are endless...

Babies nurtured with love can survive anywhere and with anyone. Activists and concerned people should focus their energy on the many malaise in our society instead of debating whether gays are capable of affection, capable of raising babies or on the legality of it all. I am sure Yonatan and Omer's son Evyatar, (literal meaning "Father is Great"), will bloom under their parentage because he is a product of their love. And for those who chee chee gays, it's time for a re-think on disliking people just because they are gays. I would give prefer to keep a safe distance from such mentalities. Remember, your sense of worth as an individual is reflected in your acceptance of people as they are...

2 comments:

Shanti Thokchom said...

at least u are breathing and beginning to write!!! keep it up, i luv to read them....

Alokita said...

Great post, really sensitive....I guess such deliberate insensitivity towards the gay community in this case, helps Indians keep stereotypes about homosexuals alive....

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